We’ve all experienced sitting down to work, and feeling unmotivated to start. Whether we’re exhausted from a night of poor sleep, distracted by problems at home, or conflicts with loved ones, our chaotic minds influence the way we see and react to people and events.
But, if we provide ourselves the space and time to process our emotions, we’ll be better equipped to calmly and consciously respond to a challenging situation or demanding work schedule, rather than letting our emotions get the better of us.
Dr. Kathryn Soule, who wrote a piece for Insight Timer around grief and the COVID-19 pandemic, understands that sitting with hard feelings may be the hardest task, but so incredibly worth it.
“Our feelings are there for a reason,” writes Dr. Soule. “All mammals are born with a similar limbic system in the brain that produces the basic emotions of happiness, sadness, fear, anger, surprise, and disgust. Each has a purpose.”
Use Your Feelings as a Map
Whether you feel unsettled after receiving negative feedback, or react with jealousy toward a co-worker’s promotion, acknowledging your feelings, and understanding why they’re there, helps give you a more mindful approach, when you need it most.
One useful exercise to follow is outlined in Julia Cameron’s The Artist’s Way. Cameron suggests adding three columns to a page with headers: ‘Trigger’, ‘Why’ and ‘Possible Action’. This format will help you map out what caused you to feel an emotion, why exactly you’re feeling that emotion, and what you can do today to process it and let it go.
No Room for Critical Judgement
When our mind is busy with ruminating thoughts, we’re less able to release frustration or make creative breakthroughs. Which is why taking time to silence the mind using meditation techniques, is extremely beneficial.
“Fear of failure is one of the most common forms of fear, and it holds you back in life. It causes you to procrastinate, to avoid, to play safe, and ultimately to sabotage yourself,” explains meditation teacher Giovanni Dienstmann.
If you continue to list and revisit all the ways you’ve been wrong or stuck at work before, you’ll end up feeling more frustrated. Instead, use positive reinforcement to remind yourself of the times that you did great and can do so again.
Lean on Gratitude, Wonder and Openness
Jeffrey Davis is a teacher, consultant, author, and Chief Wonder Tracker. Through his work, he leans on openness and wonder as positive tools to turn frustration into creative breakthrough.
“Openness is also an essential trait of successful innovators and creatives throughout history. With an appreciation of diverse perspectives and a willingness to try new things, you can better navigate daily challenges and discover novel solutions to the obstacles you face. Studies even show that openness to experience positively correlates with increased job performance and creativity.”
It is that same state of openness that can help you jump out of what he calls the “rabbit hole mind,” which is a state of ruminating thoughts or tasks that keep you from getting closer to the breakthroughs you so desire.
Creating space for our emotions and remaining open toward what appears, means we’re better able to tackle our triggers, giving us the chance to take positive action, over frustrated reaction.
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